Cloudy Day~

As the title suggests , it is actually cloudy today..and rainy..it rained and stopped alternately for 4
times this morning.. O.o anyway , i'm feeling moody today anyway..most probably i was thinking
too much i guess..which i don't have any idea what triggered this..well , this has been what i'm
 thinking since young..which also comes from  my biggest fear..

LONELINESS

yeah , coming from a not so happy family made me into a person who loves his friends more than
his family..which somehow made me ask this same question over the years , "Am I a good friend?"
i mean am i good as a friend? or you are just entertaining me as i seem so desperate for a
friend?

YES. I AM DESPERATE.

friends have been my most valuable asset till now and always will. they have been there for me
whenever and for whatever reason there is. and being raised in a family that does not
accept new things readily , i cannot be myself there. and i can be the real me whenever i'm
with friends. yeah , now you see how important friends are to me.
but lately there's an incident which makes me question myself as a friend.
i have a friend , let's call him H , whom i'm very close with in school. i used to talk to him
bout anything , anything at all. okay , after school we separated to different colleges and yeah ,
we didn't contact each other much. and few days ago was his birthday. yeah , i wished him and
all. he did reply my message and i replied him "how you've been?" and then there was no reply.
i was like "WTH?" you can reply my previous message and not this? okay fine. maybe you're
busy. fine. so i wished him again on FB. oh , it din't even take half a minute to say "thanks" .
okay , i tried chatting with him on FB . and yet this guy didn't reply anything.
yeah , and then i realised he never replies to my messages , FB wall posts or even MSN.
and i can't accept that he didn't realise i done all of that. i mean after all those years you
just decided to cut all connection with me? i was then thinking to myself "is it my fault? why
you wanna avoid me? " i've been thinking and thinking why would he do that. i've also
been thinking of the past when we used to go watch a movie or having sleepovers.
and then i realised , it was always me who made the first step. not only to him , but
basically all my friends. it will be me who's gonna call them for a movie or yam cha
sessions or sleepovers or just go to starbucks and sit and chat. and if i don't , they
won't call me. and these are some of my besties i'm talking about. even the not so close ones
will sometimes ask me out. i mean WTH? i don't call you out and you can just forget about me?
who am i to you? a nobody? and now i don't even know where i belong to anymore.
i've been having less stuff to talk to them anymore. like if i chat with them on MSN ,
it's not gonna last for an hour. it's gonna be "ok , fine , life's good " kind of short answers.
i mean is it me or you that have changed so much that we don't talk to each other anymore?
and being me , i blame myself. i always did think maybe i'm not good enough or not worthy
of being anyone's friend. seeing my friends keeping in touch , i did with some of them.
but with you , H , i give up. you won't even respond to any kind of communication from me ,
so what's the point? and despite having the fear of being forgotten , i have to move on , even
after you did or did not forgotten bout me. i can't stay at wherever i am now hoping that you
will not forget me. and though i look cheerful and strong outside , i am indeed a very fragile
person. so this situation is making my day really bad.




Signing off.

Elie's Last Day

It's de last day of class!!! so is elie in our coll..she's gonna transfer to KYUEM next year as she was offered SHELL scholar..god im gonna miss her..
n so v decided 2 go out de whole wk 2 sort off like send her off..
on mon v went cheong k..which was crazy as usual.. XD
after practical v decided 2 skip all de lectures n went times square makan..den went 2 neway scream k.. =P
till 5 den v came back..she took photos n stuff..v needa book 2 rooms bcoz there's 15 of us..
too many..haha..
anyway on fri v had lunch wif her..4 de 1st n last time.. TAT
v makan at Nando's in Alpha Angle aka Jusco..
den pics again..n went back..
at nite she posted a vid she made herself..god i cried watching dat vid..
den rach posted another vid 4 her as a reply..n i cried again..
oh i love my frens..but some of them juz 4gets me after some time..
im so pathetic..anyway best of luck in everything..

I WILL MISS YOU ELIE YIP MEI HUI!!!

HK - Shenzhen Trip

Its been quite some time reali..i juz don feel like blogging 4 de past few months..but here i am AGAIN.. 

so yea..followed my parents to HK n Shenzhen..which i don enjoy..errr..not at all but close to it..so here goes..

Day 1 :

well..woke up early of coz..makan at airport..den took de flight to HK..food served during flight was juz bad..it sucked like anything..so din even eat all..reached there n met couz Lilian..brought us jalan2 around de hotel area 4 a while..ouh..v stayed in Royal Plaza Hotel 4 de nite..anyway..it was so effing crowded man!!! imagine walking Petaling Street but de amount of ppl is at least 3 times.. = =

so ate Sichuan style food 4 dinner..awesome!! loved it..but bad 4 stomach..coz spicy.. LOL

after went to Times Square..im proud 2 tell dat our KL Times Square is much much bigger.. XD

oh..n there's diabolo performance there..but dat guy juz stayed 4 a while..so yea..too bad.. 

Note : 1.saw 3 SUPER cute dogs there!!! if onli i can keep them.. =(

          2. saw 3 wedding couples in like an hour..wow..good date i suppose? =P

Day 2 : 

woke up early again..yea..packed n everything..y?coz v'll be goin shenzhen de 2day..i onli noe it de nite b4..

anyway..de tour bus came pick us up on time..n took us 2 some restaurant 2 eat dim sum..taste? super bad..sban product is much better..environment? bad..de restaurant looked like some mafia hideout..it is underground n de way de workers conduct things juz made it worse..after dat went to sam tsui wan n chin tsui wan (not sure of the spelling)..it is basically an area which has a temple full of statues..took few pics thou..nth much 2 talk about..den went 2 some fishermen village..dat also nth much 2 talk about..den de tour guide took us 2 TSL Jewellery Shop..i was like "WTF?!!!!" nth much 2 talk also..coz all v did is listen 2 some guy talking which obviously i din pay attention to n looking at how they produce those stuff..oh..juz when i tot nobody's gonna buy anything 2 couples actuali bought sumting..1 bought a ring n another i think is some necklace or sumting..oh well..rich ppl..later de tour guide took us to a herbal store..i was like "FUCK YOU BITCH!! Y DE HELL U TOOK US HERE FOR?!!!" it was so effing boring!!! my mom n sis bought some stuff which i don eat..n den ciao..den v ate at some restaurant again..dis time de food is kinda ok..coz its like a real kinda classy type of place..den some of us who's goin shenzhen took our luggages n w8-ed 4 another bus 2 fetch us 2 de KTM station..more like LRT actuali.. when passing thru de immigration , de guy looked at me like some kind of alien..he's been looking at me from diff angle..i guess maybe i did change a lot..LOL..took de train n reached there..met a new tour guide who's in charge of us..took us 2 our hotels..onli my family stayed in Days Inn Hotel..de rest stayed in Green Tree Inn..anyway after checking in n stuffs she (de tour guide) took us 2 makan at some restaurant also..i keep saying some restaurant coz i don noe how 2 read chinese words..dats y i don noe de restaurants' name.. LOL.. after dat she fetch us back 2 hotel n v jalan2 in dongmen 4  awhile..nth much coz most of them sell ladies stuff..n us men got nth 2 do but follow them around..arghhh..

Day 3 :

woke up early again..arghh..y does dis trip feels like goin 2 skol again?!!! XD

anyway..breakfast in hotel..which i was ok wif..den went to Shenzhen Tianan Cyber Park..ya..sounds cool rite..but went in all herbal shops.. = = wat has herbs gotta do wif cyber park?!!!!

yaya..listen 2 some lady talk again..n den meet dis sifu n dat sifu..nth 2 talk much about except dat some so-called sifu trying 2 frighten my dad by saying his health very bad bla bla bla which v all noe centuries ago n trying 2 force us 2 buy some herbs or something which v declined politely till he annoyed us so much my dad started 2 scold.. = =

after dat makan at some restaurant..food ok lar..msia food still de best!! =D

den took us to Shenzhen's Window Of The World where u can c lots of mini replicas of world's famous building like Eiffel Tower n etc..took pics here n there..n i don noe y but bunches of school brats r roaming dat place..isnt it a skol day?go back 2 ur classes lar!!!don kacau us!!ouh..n i saw 1 10+- y/o gal got boobs so big as if her mom did boobs enlargement on her.. XD spent almost 3hrs here..

den v went 2 some chinese cultural place...saw 2 effing boring shows here..god they have no creativity..its de same old shit which u can c on tv..den dinner here..v literally ate wat v had 4 lunch..i mean all de dishes r de same.. WTH? = =

den went back hotel n jalan2 in dongmen again..nth much..

Day 4 :

breakfast in hotel again..after dat took train back 2 HK..again de same prob wif immigration..de gal was looking at me one kind..it seems dis time v'll b sharing bus wif another family which is gonna b late..so snack at mcD..tour guide fetch us back hotel..den jalan2 around hotel area again..dis time its like walking Petaling Street again..arghhh..after dat tour guide fetch us 2 some place called Madame Tussauds HK at The Peak..it was a place where u can c statues of famous ppl..both old like Einstein or current like Twins..so din do much..took some pics onli..coz de statues don look like real..its so fake.. = =

den go Avenue of Stars..oooohh..sounds grand..but its juz a place where u c handprints of old HK stars like Chow Yun Fat n older ones tooo.. = = BORING!!

after dat dinner at Paramount Banquet Hall..finally!! english names!! XD

food was kinda ok..but msia food's still de BEST!!

den went to Ladies Street..as de names suggest , all de stuff they sell there r ladies stuff..n keychains.. = =

nth much 2 talk about..den went back hotel..

Day 5 : 

woke up..pack..breakfast at some store dat v've been frequenting..den fly back..

conclusion?dis trip suckz n almost bored me 2 death..literally.. = =

ouh..n i noticed some things bout HK n Shenzhen :

1.HK ppl like 2 walk a lot..like A LOT..

2.HK roads r very complicated due 2 de many flyovers.. = =

3.LOTS of apartments..i din c any  terrace hses at all..

4.HK gals like 2 smoke..i saw gals smoking more than boys.. = =

5.congested streets..u have 2 squeeze thru 2 get 2 some place..

6.super rude ppl..they have dis style of talking which makes u annoyed 2 de max..

7.HK ppl like 2 use touch screen phones..so rich.. =(

8.maids have more privilege in HK than in msia..they actuali have off days.. = =

9.actors i never knew have ad actuali had..like andy lau n kenneth ma.. 

10.HK ppl don care bout traffic..they juz cross de roads as they like..

11.they have adult movies on tv in hotels..not 2 talk bout magz in every street.. = =

12.de day brighten n darkens 2 hrs earlier..here 6 pm still bright..there dark ady..

13.lots of leng zai n leng lui..most prob coz they walk so much..which made their body figure so good *drooling* XD

14.HK ppl like 2 b late..v need 2 w8 4 almost half an hour everytime..

15.v're considered rich there..y?coz v live in terrace hses..

16.they sell pork in McD!!! XD

17.funny street names..most of them consist of veg's name.. XD

18.they like salty food!!! god i will have kidney probs if i stay there 4 another wk..choi choi!!

19.they use bamboo 4 construction..instead of cranes n all..

shenzhen almost de same except :

1.almost all de places onli have chinese names..i mean chinese words..at least HK got some english ones..

2.traffic is directly oppo..our oppo lane is on our right but their's is on their left..

3.de restaurants give rice in one big bowl den u take urself..not like here they give u small bowls..

4.high class shops like markets..de workers don have any manners at all..n they act like barbarians.. = =

5.lots of diff car plates type..some got blue , red , black , etc

6.delivery uses bicycle..i hardly c any motorcycles there..

7.heavy smokers.. = = i will die of lung cancer if i stay there longer..

8.men like 2 spit everywhere...i mean esp urinating..they will spit into de stands.. gross!!! = =

dat shud be all..

Long Long Time~~

Finally I have the time 2 blog man...
i mean i actuali abandoned it 4 at least 2 MONTHS...
anyway..lots of stuff happened..
birthdays was no escape...fun stuff either..
but de one big thing that happened was TEST 3..
yea..mentioning tat sent me 2 emo mood again...
juz finished de last paper ytd...
ok..so here goes..
Day 1 : GP - pure crap..i don even noe wat im writing..i tried 2 think n think n think..but i cant..
                    coz its so effing COLD...de air cond is directly above my head n i think i sorta froze my brain..
                    oh well..at least i crapped a lot..n hope she actuali accepts my nonsense..
            MP - i forgot how dis turned out..i was quite ok as i rmbr-ed..i seem 2 have memory loss ady..
                     who gives a damn anyway..i dont..y bother rmbr-ing stuff dat r not happy..so yea..
                    feeling quite gd dat day..maybe i can do dis!!!
Day 2 : PHY - shit man!!! i couldnt do projectile like usual..i suck in waves like normal..basically i suck in
                       everything except forces n moment..even dat i cant say im reali pro..so juz did wat i can wif                  
                       my paper..which is not much..let's hope i pass... LOL..n dat paper sent me 2 emo mood...
                       OTL
            MA : i did de paper..not feeling gd bout it..due 2 de OTL-ness physics juz gave me..i did wat i could
                     n dat's it..im tired n fed up..hope MP can lift up my marks..
Day 3 : CHEM - yay! its chem..my 2nd fav subject besides MP..but de paper juz sent every1 to hell..
                           fucking hard man!!! yes i said fucking...not de usual effing..can imagine how extreme de
                          paper was...i literally almost hand in my paper empty..i juz wrote n wrote without knowing
                          wat i was writing exactly..i pretty sure i effed up my paper..ya..i can kiss my scholarship
                          goodbye..chem paper juz confirmed dat..i will send u down de river.. OTL 99 man dat nite..
Day 4 : FMA - here it goes again...same old same old..couldnt care less anymore..i juz read n read..if i cant
                        do dats it..im using all my strength 2 keep myself from breaking mentally n emotionally..
                        i juz did de paper n surprisingly it did help 2 lift up my mood A BIT..not dat i noe how 2 do
                        all but at least i did ma..
            FMP - revision time was hellish..i juz don have de mood 2 read anymore..i juz flip thru my bk n dats
                       it..i cant go on anymore..if i don noe how 2 do , so be it!!! but de paper came out ok..
                      maybe can get 60 gua..
so after all dat hellish depressing mother fucking papers.. i went 2 wangsa wif calvin , yt , kf , cherrie , yv , yss n mer win..v went 2 makan at de ice shop..i think its called snow flizz or sumting..anyway..after dat v went pasar malaming..bought food 2 eat...de pasar malam style..eating while walking..so sore throat now.. TAT
anyway met mr keong n his mom there..awww so sweet..so hard 2 find a guy in mid 20s or almost 30 pasar malaming wif moms.. LOL.. yea..n yt n calvin came 2 my hse 2 play mahjong..but it din last long coz v were so sleepy n tired...so they went back almost 3.30 am like dat...den yss n i pack a bit den sleep..
dis mornin woke up n came back..
OH YEA!!!! MY LAPTOP WAS STOLEN!!!\
damn fuck wei..,my precious laptop was stolen..n i don even noe how de thief did it...from de window i guess..oh my movies..games...series..fuck man!!! i gotta re-dl everything again!!!
oh well..i guess dats all.. ciao.. =D